“Because I Said So” Is Not an Argument

Why It Matters

You’ve probably heard it before. You ask “why?” and the answer is: “Because I said so.” Or: “Because I’m the parent.” Or: “Because I’m the teacher.” The person isn’t giving you a reason — they’re telling you that their position or power is the reason.

Sometimes that’s enough. If a parent says “Don’t touch the stove, because I said so,” and the stove is hot, you should listen first and ask questions later. Authority has a purpose, and there are moments when obeying quickly matters more than understanding why.

But as an argument? “Because I said so” doesn’t work. It doesn’t explain anything. It doesn’t give you a reason you can think about, check, or learn from. If the only reason to believe something is that a powerful person says it’s true, then the argument falls apart the moment a different powerful person says the opposite. You need actual reasons, not just authority.

A Story

The Science Fair Dispute

Rosa and her lab partner Ethan were building a science fair project about which type of soil helps plants grow fastest. They’d run their experiment and found that the sandy soil mix grew the tallest plants. They were excited about their results.

During the class review session, an older student named Marcus — a sixth grader who had won the science fair the year before — walked by their table and glanced at their poster. “That’s wrong,” he said. “Clayey soil is better for plants. Everyone knows that.”

Ethan looked nervous. “He won the science fair last year,” he whispered to Rosa. “Maybe we messed something up.”

But Rosa thought about it. “What’s his evidence?” she asked. “He didn’t say why clayey soil is better. He just said he’s right because he knows. But we actually ran the experiment. We have data.”

Their teacher, Ms. Park, overheard and stepped in. “Rosa’s right to ask that question. Marcus might have a point — different plants do better in different soils, and maybe the type of plant matters here. But ‘I’m an expert’ isn’t a scientific argument. If Marcus has a reason, he should share it. And if he does, Rosa and Ethan should consider it seriously. That’s how science works — evidence and reasons, not who has the most trophies.”

Marcus came back later, a little embarrassed. “I looked it up,” he said. “Sandy soil actually does drain better, which helps some plants. I was thinking of vegetable gardens, not your kind of plant. Sorry — your data is right.” Rosa and Ethan added a note to their poster about how soil type matters differently for different plants. Their project got stronger because they’d checked the claim instead of just accepting it.

Vocabulary

Authority

Power or expertise that gives someone influence over others. Authority can come from a position (like a teacher or parent) or from knowledge (like a scientist or experienced person).

Appeal to authority

Using someone’s power, status, or reputation as the reason to believe a claim, instead of giving actual evidence. “It’s true because the principal says so” is an appeal to authority.

Reasoning

The process of connecting evidence to a claim through clear, logical steps that anyone can follow and check.

Obedience

Following instructions from someone in authority. Obedience is sometimes necessary, but it’s different from being convinced by an argument.

Guided Teaching

Let’s be clear about something right away: this lesson is not about disobeying adults. Parents and teachers have authority for real reasons — they’re responsible for your safety, your education, and your well-being. When a parent says “stop” or a teacher says “sit down,” you should listen, even if you don’t understand why yet.

But there’s a difference between obeying someone and being convinced by their argument. You can obey a rule while still thinking about whether the reason behind it makes sense. And when someone uses their authority as the only reason for a claim — not a command, but a claim about what’s true — that’s worth noticing.

In the story, Marcus said the soil results were wrong. His only reason was basically “I know more than you.” Was that a real argument? What would a real argument from Marcus have sounded like?

Here’s the tricky part: sometimes an authority figure actually does know something important. A doctor who says “You need to eat less sugar” probably has medical knowledge behind that claim. A firefighter who says “That building isn’t safe” probably knows something about structures. The problem isn’t listening to experts — it’s accepting “because I’m the expert” as the whole argument instead of asking for the reasoning behind it.

Think about it: if a doctor says “eat less sugar because sugar causes tooth decay and raises your risk of diabetes,” that’s a real argument with reasons. If a doctor says “eat less sugar because I’m the doctor,” that’s an appeal to authority. What’s the difference in how you can evaluate those two statements?

The real test is: could a different person with the same authority say the opposite? If one coach says “stretching before a game prevents injuries” and another coach says “stretching before a game doesn’t help,” you can’t just pick the coach you like better. You need to ask: what’s the evidence? What’s the reasoning? Authority alone can’t settle it because authority alone doesn’t point to truth.

Here’s the big question: how do you respectfully ask someone in authority for their reasons without being rude? What would that sound like?

Asking “why?” isn’t disrespectful. In fact, it’s a sign that you take someone seriously enough to want to understand their thinking. “I want to understand your reason” is not the same as “I don’t respect you.” A good teacher, parent, or coach will appreciate the question. And if someone won’t give you any reason except “because I say so” when you’re genuinely trying to understand, that’s worth noticing — even if you still have to obey.

For Discussion

1. 1.What does it mean to “appeal to authority”?
2. 2.In the story, was Marcus wrong about the soil? Or was he wrong about something else? What exactly was his mistake?
3. 3.What’s the difference between obeying someone and being convinced by their argument?
4. 4.When is it okay to follow authority without fully understanding the reasons?
5. 5.How can you ask an authority figure for their reasons in a way that’s respectful, not rude?
6. 6.If two experts disagree, how do you figure out who’s right? Can you just pick the one you like?
7. 7.Why did Marcus come back and change his mind? What does that tell you about him?

Practice

Authority or Argument?

1. 1.For each statement below, decide: is the person giving a real reason, or are they just appealing to their authority? If it’s an appeal to authority, try to think of what a real reason might sound like.
2. 2.1. “You should wear a helmet because I’m your mother.”
3. 3.2. “You should wear a helmet because head injuries from bike accidents can be severe, and helmets reduce the risk by about 70 percent.”
4. 4.3. “This painting is good because the art teacher said so.”
5. 5.4. “We need to leave now because I said we’re leaving.”
6. 6.5. “We need to leave now because the parking meter expires in five minutes and I don’t want a ticket.”
7. 7.Now practice with a parent: think of a rule in your house that you’ve been told to follow. Ask your parent to explain the real reason behind it. Then discuss together: was the reason a good one? Could the rule be improved?

Memory Questions

1. 1.What is an appeal to authority?
2. 2.What’s the difference between obeying someone and being convinced by their argument?
3. 3.In the story, what did Rosa do when Marcus said their results were wrong?
4. 4.Why is “because I said so” not really an argument, even if it’s sometimes a good enough reason to obey?
5. 5.When two authorities disagree, how can you figure out who’s right?
6. 6.How can you respectfully ask an authority figure for their reasons?